Beginnings

I thought about starting a blog after Isabel's death but I didn't want to start something on a sad time. So now this is starting after I move house, only 10 mins from the hospital and closer to civilisation. Also I am 15 weeks pregnant with the next baby bean. The cycle has started again and although I feel an ache to not be able to hold Isabel I know I will have another baby. December seems so far away, the start of a pregnancy always seems to go so slowly. Waiting to get to the magic 12 weeks, waiting for the second scan to know what's in there.

My belly is starting to round a little so I feel happier to be becoming obviously pregnant. It will be a while before people feel they can ask if I am a little rounded or pregnant, but at least I know it's rounding for the baby bean. The next hurdle is the first movement. I knew I would miss not having a baby inside because it was reassuring to have a baby kicking and moving and to be constantly acompanied by someone. Unfortunatly I thought the movement inside would be replaced by movement outside. I think I will feel reassured when I can feel the bean moving and wiggling.

Baby bean with hands in front of face. The doctor had to move the little one to get other measurements and it was not at all impressed and did the hands waving in front of face thing, very much a 'stop bothering me' movement.